I do what I do without being conscious about what I do. Because I don’t think about it, it’s more of an instinctive thing. So if something is happening, I am immediately driven. I don’t analyse or anything like that. I just respond. And I think that is how I’ve always been, as soon as there’s been an event that affects me, alarms me, enrages me, enjoys me or whatever. There’s something in me that drives me to attend. And it’s not rational. I don’t think about it, I don’t work it out. I’ll just go. And that is what the most recent thing I did was, was to walk across the common that day and go to the bandstand to see what was happening. I didn’t think about it. I didn’t discuss it with anybody. It was just something that I did, I came out the house, and my body walked me there. And that is what I have reacted like, even my very young life. Against any situation. I didn’t think things through. I always reacted. And I still don’t think things, I didn’t think things through last week. Yeah, I just get… my body takes me. Not my brain.

But as the doctor said, when I had my brain scan, and he discovered all the dreadful bits, I said to him, does that mean I have the early effects? I can’t, I can’t say it Jeanne without laughing…

Do I have early onset Alzheimer’s to the guy who was looking at this picture that had my brain in it, or lack of. I said, Does this mean that I’ve got early onset Alzheimers? He said, “No you’ve got very long term Alzheimer’s, your 66”. I never equated it with age. We were in stitches well we shouldn’t have been in stitches, but it was funny,  I think even Steven found that funny. And he definitely did. I mean talk about being the thick you know, it’s a bit embarrassing really Jeanne.


Can I stop now ’cause i’m feeling too embarrassed.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay.

– 17th March 2021